Breaking the Negative Behavior Cycle - Part 2

Whether the negative behavior cycle is just picking up steam or is already in full swing, you can take the first step in breaking it and restoring healthy relationships in your family. Despite your initial instincts, the first step is not to call the zoo to have them take your child away. Nor is it to get heavy with the discipline. Instead, it is to plan a few “special times” with your child -- short one-on-one times where you can have fun and connect together.

Let your child choose the activity, within reason. If you would like, you can begin your time with a short prayer and then enjoy a fun activity together.  However, as you may have suspected, this is not your average play time. You will be busy sowing some very important seeds.

Watch your child closely during this time and point out his positive behavior, no matter how small. Make it a highly fun and rewarding time for both of you. If your child does something disrespectful, give him one chance to correct his behavior. If he does, tell him he made a good choice. If not, then your special time will be over for today.

No matter how challenging your child is, having a special time several times a week will begin to break the negative behavior cycle by creating new positive interactions that will help offset the negative ones. You will remember that you actually like your child (usually, that is) and your child will remember that his mom and dad are not evil ogres.

Special time communicates that your child is important to you -- and that message will slowly seep through your child’s tough exterior. As you strengthen your relationship with your child, there are other things you can do to improve your child’s behavior as well. I’ll show you those in future blogs. But for now, break the negative behavior cycle by showing your child how important he is with two of the greatest weapons God has given you: your love and your time.

2 comments (Add your own)

1. Flip wrote:
I literally jumped out of my chair and dcnaed after reading this!

Mon, November 21, 2011 @ 7:59 AM

2. rqvqtry wrote:
Vic64g xjmeohfmzmfv

Tue, November 22, 2011 @ 2:07 AM

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